Friday, January 28, 2005

american idle

mr. x is pooping in his own seat.

the kind of person who ought to be put in a novel. the kind of man who deserves being crucified in a jumble of words. the kind of man you wouldn't waste your time lambasting in person. he'd rather be degraded in a pad of bond papers (or in an empty microsoft word document) than drain your oral fluids and get nothing.

he exists everywhere. scattered like a pile of dogshit run over by a 4x4 sport utility vehicle.

he's not an american, chose to be, but could never be one.

america exists only in his dreams. in his fantasies. in his environs. he pretends. that what makes him happy.

he thrives on his own arrogance. he claims such-and-such, bragging this-and-that, but that's all he could do.

he acts as if he is the leader of the pack, but what a leader does, is a vacuum in his leadership. he is dependent of his pack. he freezes in hot summer. he still freezes in winter. he never moves. he is lethargy in every sense of the word. he is the definition of laziness.

i pity the man because he is unaware of his doings.

but i thank him...

...gave me an idea to write.

latest musing of Etchie at 20:17 0 comments

Sunday, January 23, 2005

stall

it is quite apparent that i have lost whatever touch i had way back.

perhaps one of the reasons why i haven't written a single thing since i came to florida 6 months ago. yes. the last time i wrote something was when i was still nursing my languid arse at the former workplace in manila- - -contemplating on an appropriate time to leave while my head prowled through a cornucopia of office peeves, digging through the rubbish for a perfect oasis to quench a thirst.

i don't know.

such mental collapse is inevitable. the malignancy of boredom that perpetuated a stagnation of brain juice. frozen solid. demands a massive defrost. shove my head in a microwave or something.

i tried reading the backlogs. unfinished missives that are screaming for a conclusion. stalled in someway. neglected.

lacking the confidence to start over again. learn how to write again. learn how to re-create. learn how to re-develop.

i'm losing the muses.

aargh.

i can't even think of a proper title for this entry....

latest musing of Etchie at 00:55 0 comments

Saturday, January 22, 2005

quiz dos

took the other quiz.

thanks dodo for the link. hehe.

here's what came out.

You must like to spank or be spanked, because your
romance is remeniscent of Secretary. A truly
modern love story, it shows that you don't need
to be conventional to be normal. You're
probably the type that owns a whole lot more
leather than what's upholstering your car or
sofa. Yeah, you know what I mean.

What Romance Movie Best Represents Your Love Life?
brought to you by Quizilla

uh. pain and pleasure are only separated by perception. ha-! can't remember when. :D
not a masochist. would rather be the one inflicting the pain.

searching for a maggie glyenhaal to play my fantasies. hehe.

latest musing of Etchie at 13:46 0 comments

Friday, January 21, 2005

quiz

uh. took a quiz in a link from another blog.

here's the result:

Which Member of the Endless Are You?

dream...boy? ugh.

nuts.

latest musing of Etchie at 14:40 0 comments

luho

yesterday went shopping. my little daughter deserves something as a prize. she grraduated from being mommy and daddy's bedside pet into being an independent four-year old. yep.

damn boogeyman and those fucking closet creatures. i don't know, but i carry no reason to believe why they should fabricate tales merely to frighten kids....

anyway. sailed through toys r us. fortunate i didn't have to shed a single buck for her doll. sas did. hehe.

forced my way to borders. insistent ranting prevailed. got four dvds. thought i'd let sas pay for it. hehe.

no. time for the sucker to pay for his luho.

besides, that's the only consolation i get, right?

latest musing of Etchie at 14:26 0 comments

Saturday, January 15, 2005

milking the cow

i want to write something in this blog. not just a two sentence paragraph that usually borders on some nonsense scrap of wisdom, but an active quip of my passive mental processes.

yeah. so i've noticed. i'm scribbling like ellroy. bits and pieces of phrases- - -a kindergarten on the first steps of learning, pushing his way through an abundance of the statutes of grammar. damn. living on expletives. a survival on vocabulary.

uh. ellroy has ten books in his belt. he has the right to change the structure of his prose. struggling in nonconformities.

drat.

i fucking stalled.

latest musing of Etchie at 22:20 3 comments

Tuesday, January 11, 2005

short requiem

mark sent me an IM (instant message) yesterday. in it, a grim news.

orly punzalan passed away last friday. to us, he was simply "tata orly" or "sir orly". he was our radio broadcasting subject professor back in my letran days. he was known as a veteran radio broadcast journalist, father to actress princess, and former husband to the late helen vela. he perfected the craft of being a broadcast journalist- - -he taught us to become one.

i didn't heed the call to have my voice on radio. i'd rather be in the rear end.

nyway, humility is tata orly's greatest virtue. the one thing i remember of such is his babylos (coined by someone working at letran)- - -a 1979 mitsubishi galant, proudly wearing a rusting green paint and a plastic cover for the rear window. he has this distinct modulated voice that only someone in the broadcasting business could produce. he never pushed us to become someone like him, we all have our place in the sun, he would say. yeah.

a good man. a good professor.

farewell, tata orly.

latest musing of Etchie at 13:36 1 comments

Monday, January 10, 2005

curled up

current literary indulgence:

the company of strangers by robert wilson.

deviating from alan furst. worth a try.

latest musing of Etchie at 12:59 0 comments

Saturday, January 08, 2005

borderline exhibitionist

or the reason why you blog...

the title speaks for itself. to quote al pacino in The Devil's Advocate, "vanity is definitely, my favorite sin".

naw. it's more of...to satiate a fetish. a masturbation of sort.

blogging is coitus.

latest musing of Etchie at 19:32 0 comments

Friday, January 07, 2005

blank

blogging in the office. murdering the clock. way past lunchtime. rainclouds threatening to burst. dark. heavy. a sackcloth of nature's precipitations. evaporated. condensed. recycled.

will head home in a little while.

latest musing of Etchie at 13:22 0 comments

Tuesday, January 04, 2005

compensated

got my first paycheck on my new job.

money is liberating. an emancipation from the chains of fruitless wanting. a constant reminder of the world in motion. the ephemeral force that drives man. the key to material survival. whatever.

i don't give a damn about metaphors.

uh. to earn is human...

latest musing of Etchie at 20:27 1 comments

Monday, January 03, 2005

backlog chronicles

tried to read what i've written a year ago. some of 'em i've ended, some of them waiting for an appropriate closure. it seems that i have this unusual friction of ending stories- - -something that i believe is an innate quality- - -the difficulty of deciding a perfect conclusion. now, i'm counting four short stories and a planned screenplay. two are exorcised demons. one is a seductive muse who invaded my privacy amidst the influx of scholarship applications. and another is...uh...a flush in the toilet bowl.

so, there are my backlogs. kept away. locked in the vault of my harddrive.

waiting to be fished out. apparently, they lie there- - -unknowing, denied the suspense. declined what's due.

until my mind pisses me off and put the pen into my brain.

latest musing of Etchie at 21:09 0 comments

burn up excess

i'm getting fat.

it's one of those days that i would just stand up in front of the mirror and look.

now i've seen the worst of me. a certain chunk of vanity scraped. the flabs in tummy like an opaque jel-o (uh..did u say jel-o? or gelo? haha- - -see, dang? follow you anywhere). haha.

i know the reason: immersed in gallons of calories like most americans do. living in the vast land of hamburgers and pizza. of milkshakes and sodas.

searching for some kind of exercise. stretch my muscles and burn my fats.

( ! ) er...

naw. who says exercise anyway?

latest musing of Etchie at 11:25 1 comments

day of the blog

dada finally put up a blog. something his kuya bugged her into since he started his public missive months back.

someone heeded the push. hehe.

but then i've realized: she's more articulate than i am. darn. the younger ones always get the credit.

hehe.

latest musing of Etchie at 10:59 1 comments

fixed

fixed the problem with the laptop last night. back in business. renewed life, i guess? albeit temporary. it might crash anytime.

harddrive's plagued by bad sectors. somebody told me it needs a system reformat. something i don't plan on doing since i haven't had the time to backup all my files. well, now that i've put the computer back on running, i'll definitely make a backup--either on a disc or an external hard drive.

tried a notebook window-shopping at several online stores. my vision of an apple ibook is slowly diminishing. setting my sights on a Sony Vaio VGN-S260 or the T models preferably. if i could get a nod on a financing application, will probably get it first thing my pay arrives.

sigh.

just keep on dreaming, Etchie.

latest musing of Etchie at 01:02 0 comments

Sunday, January 02, 2005

new year plus one

clocking january 2. 2005. second day of the new year.

brought my body back to life. 9 hours of sleep. 9 hours of exploring the alternate world.

dementia kicking in. dumb. numb. incoherent.

gobbling down the last of the coke. the pleasures of last drop.

ruminating nothing. mind blank.

fixed the computer. thank God. blogging. stuck. down with the rig.

catharsis for boredom. ain't that comforting?

latest musing of Etchie at 13:09 0 comments

Saturday, January 01, 2005

getting even with hitch

current re-read:

looking back at Alfred Hitchcock with delightful fixations.

reminiscing a college thesis. streams of caffeine. wastebasket of donuts.

i miss the fun.

latest musing of Etchie at 23:50 3 comments

...and i have promises to keep

i don't have a particular new year's resolution to make.

it seemed too...cliched. it's a fool-yourself thing. you think of one and your whole world falls apart attempting to reach that length.

why make one when in the end you can't keep it?

resolutions are promises-broken. a canister that fell short of its intended objective. a `kwitis' lacking sufficient `pulbura' to make it puff. a three-point shot that rimmed.

anything that is an irony.

hehe. life is a hyperbole. resolutions are sacrifices. it just doesn't make sense to me.

latest musing of Etchie at 21:41 0 comments

access decline

yesterday, i tried to get a new computer.

we applied for financing one. ended up empty-handed. said that the financial institution responsible for such payment scheme denied our application.

have no idea why. have no idea on how those things work. beats me.

i just want a new computer. that's all.

spent the new year daydreaming.

latest musing of Etchie at 21:20 0 comments

No Smoking Joint